The sad dream

I had a bitterly sad dream last night. I’m sure I know the cause of it: I watched Randy Pausch’s “Time Management” lecture yesterday, and I’m certain that his circumstances contributed to the dream.

In the dream, the Norm half of vickyandnorm had been diagnosed with a terminal disease and in the strange, dream-like fashion in which time is compressed and altered, he knew that he had only one more day to live. The entire gang gathered at some place by the sea to say goodbye. strausmouse was there with rmstraus, kruppenheimer was there. Vicky was there, of course. I can’t remember if Andy was there or not. In general, everyone seemed happy and was trying to keep their spirits up, but I did so only through the greatest difficulty. I kept thinking of how Vicky must feel, and inevitably, it brought me to tears. I remember at one point hugging Lisa, she telling me that it was all going to be okay. But I couldn’t look at Norm. I would glance over at him when I thought he wasn’t looking and find him looking back at me, and then we’d both look away.

This scene went on for quite some time, with people joking, laughing, crying, talking. Finally, I summoned the courage to get up and say goodbye to Norm. His back was to me and he was talking to someone (Lisa, perhaps). I tapped him on the shoulder and when he turned around, I was stunned to find out that it was not Norm that was sick, but my brother, Doug. I don’t remember anything after that. I must have awakened from the dream. Still, it’s left me with a strange feeling all morning, and five or six hours later, I still haven’t been able to shake the feeling.