The mysteries of Amazon.com’s shipping algorithm

Several days ago, I ordered Andy Rooney‘s new book of essays, Out of My Mind from Amazon.com.

I selected the Standard shipping option, which is 5-7 business days.

I received a confirmation, estimating a delivery date of October 11.

Today when I checked the shipping status, it said the “unit” had arrived at my local post office at 5:26 AM.

When I got home, I had the book.

I’m not complaining, but what’s wrong with this picture? Is Amazon’s algorithm for estimating delivery so bad that they miss their target (plus or minus) by a whole week? Am I asking too much here? I should just go with it, right? Okay.

I am an Andy Rooney fan. What can I say. He writes great essays, and he’s hilarious. I’m not sure there is a better humor essayist alive today. Of course, I don’t read any other humor essayists so I wouldn’t know. But I blame that on the fact that there are no good humor essayists out there, except for Mr. Rooney. I know, you’re going to throw David Sedaris at me. He’ll get a smirk out of me every now and then when I read something of his in THE NEW YORKER; but he’s minor leagues compared to Andy Rooney. I like my essayists squat, and curmudgeonly, with unkempt bushy-white eyebrows. Oh, and they have to be able to write. But that’s just me.

I started the book 10 minutes ago and I laughed for the first time in the second paragraph of the first essay. It’s going to be fun on the train into work tomorrow…

Published by Jamie Todd Rubin

Jamie Todd Rubin writes fiction and nonfiction for a variety of publications including Analog, Clarkesworld, The Daily Beast, 99U, Daily Science Fiction, Lightspeed, InterGalactic Medicine Show, and several anthologies. He was featured in Lifehacker’s How I Work series. He has been blogging since 2005. By day, he manages software projects and occasionally writes code. He lives in Falls Church, Virginia with his wife and three children. Find him on Twitter at @jamietr.