New outgoing voicemail message

After countless years of the same old boring outgoing voicemail message on my phone, I have decided to take the matter in my own hands and do a complete revision. After a number of takes (for clarity of signal, and because I kept messing up), I have a new outgoing message on my cellphone. Well, not exactly a new message, really it’s more a set of notes toward an outgoing message.


My new outgoing voicemail “message”:

To begin with, this is not an outgoing voicemail message, so much as a series of notes toward one.

The outgoing message I intend to leave will be both humorous and yet subtly confusing to the caller, who, upon hearing the outgoing message, might wonder if they’ve gotten a wrong number.

But they will recognize my voice, and hear me recite the number that they have reached, XXX-XXX-XXXX, and all will be well.

The outgoing message will be unlike any outgoing message the caller has ever heard before. It will (when I get around to recording it) instruct the caller to leave me their name, number and a brief message. I might even indicate my desire to call them back.

But this is not the outgoing message, merely a series of notes toward one. I really don’t know what I’ll say when it comes time to record the piece of BEEP!