Verizon vs. Me

When we bought our house 8 years ago the previous owner had subscribed to Verizon’s Fios services. We opted for Cox instead of Verizon. It is a decision I have never regretted. The few times we’ve had an issue with our cable or Internet over the last 8 years, Cox has always resolved the problem quickly. Their customer service is friendly, and helpful.

Each week for the last 8 years I get a mailing from Verizon urging me to switch to their service. Sometimes this is little more than a cardstock advertisement. Other times, it is a more elaborate campaign, a thick fancy envelop that looks like it is stuffed with lots of important things. What it is stuffed with is nothing more than an offer to switch to Verizon.

Week after week, year after year, these mailings get tossed in a wastebasket that sits just inside the front door. The entire purpose of this wastebasket is to catch the week’s load of junk mail, unopened. I have never responded to Verizon, never taken them up on their offer to switch. I am happy with Cox and the service they provide.

Does Verizon not take the hint? You’d think after something on the order of 416 mailings, someone at Verizon would get the idea that I am not a likely customer. You’d think that their sophisticated software would parse out the fact that I have never shown any interest in their service, despite 416 attempts to get me to switch.

I often imagine someone in a cubicle at Verizon, looking through the data, and saying, yeah, we’ve sent him 416 mailings, and he hasn’t switched yet, but the 417th mailing will be the straw that breaks the camel’s back. This is the same person, I imagine, who is certain that the next lottery ticket they buy will hit the jackpot.

And how much it is costing Verizon for me to ignore them? Let’s say that all-in, each mailing costs $1 (postage, preparation, materials, labor, everything). $416 bucks is a lot to invest on someone who obviously is not switching to your service.

I feel badly about this. So let me help you out Verizon, as plainly and simply as I can:

I’m happy with Cox, and I have no plans to switch to Verizon. Period. End of story.

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